Week 16 – Do something that makes my eyes roll.

Do something that makes my eyes roll. I added that to my 40 Reasons list as I neared the end of the list and my ideas were beginning to dry up. In recent years, I’d learned that, sometimes, doing the thing I thought to be silly or stupid or ridiculous still had something lovely to give me. So I added the idea to my list thinking it would be a good growth experience. As I’ve been piecing together a schedule for checking off each item on my list, I am always quick to skip past it. I see it and I try to look away quickly and hope we didn’t make eye contact and that it didn’t see me. I don’t really want to do that. Why did I put it on there? I could remove it entirely like I did with Zumba, but it feels like cheating. And I’ve been really trying to get out of my comfort zone so this feels like something I should do.

Alright, here goes. In the not-so-distant past, I’ve mocked people for doing or saying things that I deemed to be cheesey motivational speak or new-agey and crunchy or exercises in self-absorption. I’m learning that I may have been just keeping my guard up and that I’m quite possibly a raging a-hole. It’s easier to be skeptical and cynical and assume that things won’t work or have no value than it is to be open to the possibility of something bigger, better, and greater than what you currently have. Because doing something bigger, being something more, and going after something better than what you currently have doesn’t come with guarantees and it’s scary as hell. And in order to go after that bigger, better, greater thing, you have to put it out there. Like actually tell people you want it and you are doing it.

It really can’t be a huge secret. We don’t hide things that we are proud of and excited about. We hide things that we are ashamed of or think that people may judge us for. And I know personally that people can be reeeeeaaaal judge-y.

So if you’ve been reading this blog from the beginning, you probably know that I’ve made some changes to my life in the past couple of years. I’ve cultivated some good habits and I’ve adopted a new way of looking at things that has made my life better. And now I want more. The little changes have made me want big changes and they make me feel like more is totally possible. They make me feel like if I didn’t try for more, I’d be selling my self short. And life is to short for that business. So, I decided it was time to put it out there. The first thing I needed to do was decide exactly what the more was that I wanted. I needed to create a clear vision of how I wanted my life to look. And that’s when I realized I would do one of the things that I always made fun of. I was going to make a vision board. (Cringe)

In the past, I’d rolled my eyes and think things like “Oh good, I’m glad that making a collage on poster board is going to help you achieve your goal of a kitchen remodel.” Or “That’s great that playing with scissors and glue sticks is your ticket to your dream job.” Man, I really am a raging a-hole.

The truth of the matter is that if you don’t identify what it is you are working toward then what the hell are you working toward? And if you don’t know what it is you want, how do you set goals to get it? Like the wall at my gym reads, “Dreams are goals with deadlines.”

I subscribe to that now. Maybe I’m a crunchy, new-agey, motivational-speak loving, raging a-hole, but I subscribe to that. I’ll share my big dreams with you soon, when the time is right. For now you can peep my vision board and get a sense of where I’m headed.

What are your big dreams? Share them with me in the comments, either here or on social media. I’d also love to know if you are willing to share something that makes your eyes roll and take a personal challenge.

 

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